. . .and we're back!

Ok, I admittedly spent my first shift back at home "sick". I have no regrets because I was just plain exhausted and didn't feel I'd give the best patient care with my eyes half-cocked. My second shift was when I was back to work. . .but then again, not really. I walked the halls thinking about the people who will so desperately need follow-up care and won't get it any time soon. And the free clinic we left behind that doesn't have a chance of calling all the people they say they are to report abnormal labs. Leaving such a desperate situation and coming back to the WFMC was something I wasn't really able to digest in one shift. Or two shifts. It's so complicated. I feel guilty for having what I have. I feel anger towards people who complain about their care here. I feel horrible about all the people we left behind who had never asked for the situation they find themselves in - but yet want to stay and help their community. I don't even pick the trash up off my property lines, yet a resident down there mows all the lawns on his street just to keep the neighborhood looking somewhat residential, instead of abandoned.

I learned so much from the residents down there, just in the short time I had with each one I met. I learned an equal amount from the people I traveled down there with. These preconceived notions that plague me. . .when am I gonna learn? So many people surprised me with their integrity and leadership, I can't even believe it. I have 38 new friends, my inbox is full of reunion planning emails, and I have a whole new perspective on my daily life, married life and the world. I was warned by our head nurse during the planning meeting before we left that "this will change your life". I believed that the experience would be significant, but not quite life changing. . .yet here I am.