July is Gone Already?

I figure I should at least get one post in for the month of July. My contributions to this "blog" have been ridiculously small considering all of the current events. Baby boy coming, summer shenanigans, Harry Potter - what more could one ask for? But alas, my last post referenced the Bud Light swear jar commercial, ah well. Best intentions.

I'm a little over 1/2 way through the pregnancy. 23 weeks. I can't really complain about anything. I have developed a belly in the last few weeks, but continue to only have minimal symptoms - heartburn is the symptom of the month. Raging, fire-breathing heartburn. But if that's it, I'll do just fine. First no morning sickness, now a little heartburn. I'm afraid this will all catch up to me in the third trimester, but I'm trying to stay in the moment.

It's hard to believe sometimes what's really going on. I mean, right now, there is a little human inside me wiggling around. He moves a lot. Isn't that crazy? And in another few months, he'll be wiggling around in our arms. How does this happen? We have a nursery picked out, but it's empty right now. We completed registries at babies 'r us, target and amazon.com, which was both fun, and completely overwhelming. Talk about too many choices. . .oy. Babies 'r us superstore is like a Super Target with only baby items. We got out our little checklist from Consumer Reports, then proceeded to use their Best Baby Products book to register for the "CR Best Buy" for what felt like 3,000 items.

I would post the pics from our last ultrasound, but I only have two. One of his legs, and one of his, well. . .man tackle. The ultrasound tech was obviously impressed and thought it should be on our fridge. So there it resides.

I guess that's all for now. I'm going to try to post more often, I suppose I can only go up from here!

Swear Jar

i long for swearing in the workplace. . .

Bud Light: Swear Jar

Posted Jun 04, 2007

The swear jar is the best f@#*ing idea I've ever seen!

the mind boggles

could there possibly be more options for general baby care items? i'm trying to work on a budget, just to get an idea of how much money we're going to need for the ol' start up costs, and i'm going to beat my head on the desk. first off, i don't do well with options. one of the reasons why in 'n out burger is one of my favorite eating establishments, the menu consists of: the burger and the cheeseburger. oh and fries. ah simplicity. . .anyway, i'm trying to work the consumer reports route, just to trim down the herd. but with most items, they don't even know what to tell you - ". . .it's basically your preference" - well if i knew what that was, these decisions wouldn't be an issue; however, i happen to be one of the least informed/knowledgeable pregnant females this side of the mississippi. and i do REALLY mean that. when your husband has to tutor you on your own fertility cycle, you know things are bad.

anyway, so far i've narrowed it down to one stroller. which from what i can glean from the lousy description, can also double as a car seat - god help us when we have to figure that one out. that's all i got so far. according to my check list, i only have about 20 more "things" to get.

1st appt. with Midwife

Very uneventful appt. which is just fine with me. They have a fabulous clinic over there, and I am both relieved and excited to have a midwife - they are fully on board with the birth that I want and put me at ease.

She tried to ascultate fetal heart sounds, but we didn't have any luck, so she did a portable sonogram to for reassurance. We saw the heart flutter and we saw it jump around and move. I know this picture isn't the best, but you can make it out. You can see it's little arms and legs too!

Next appt. is in June. :-)

No Longer an Embryo. . .

It's now a FETUS.

For those of you who don't know already, I'm 11 weeks pregnant. . .I can hear the gasps of horror. I know, it's truly unbelievable. . .I have to remind myself occasionally that I'm supposed to provide for someone other than myself in less than nine months. I guess more like seven months? I go from stages of being totally elated to being completely terrified. Which I hear is thankfully normal.


I was extremely thankful that I didn't have loads of nausea and vomiting in the first couple months. I did have nausea, and still do, but nothing like what I assumed I was destined for since my mother had morning/afternoon/night sickness. So far so good. We go for our first appointment with the midwife on Tuesday and I'm once again excited and terrified. I think being a nurse has put me in the position of knowing just enough to be dangerous. I know just how many things can go wrong between now and delivery, and it amazes me that there are as many babies coming out with all of it's parts and pieces as there are. I mean, it's a freakishly alien process. Just crazy.

So, I couldn't NOT blog about this anymore, so this is my first. There really isn't much to describe though. My belly has actually popped a bit, but I believe I had a little head start in that department pre-pregnancy. I can be ravenously hungry, nauseous and bloated all in a matter of three minutes. I'm sad some days, can't stop smiling others. Oh, and I'm basically back in adolescence as far as the acne goes. That's great fun. A little blast from the past. Kent and I will gladly accept all the good vibes that you want to send because we're gonna need it!

Meteor Collision Averted - 80s style

Welcome Baby Wii

Yes, we bought one. They may be entertaining, but they're also heart-healthy!

I can see myself 9 pounds lighter already.

I may be a cat lady, but. . .

at least I'm not her.

I do not like them, Sam I am.

Imagine my surprise to find that I've been essentially feeding my three cats poison. I learned Sunday that there was a recall on some Iams food - which ended up being MY Iams food. The food I've been feeding them since last Thursday. I call the emergency vet (it is after all, Sunday) and I'm told that I should actually NOT wait until Monday to come in, but to bring them in now, for some nice high-priced emergency vet care. So go in, with all three in tow and find out that Squirt is in full-blown acute renal failure, Kuzco and Pacha are also in renal failure, but to a lesser degree. That's what Squirt gets for being a good eater. . .more toxins.

This morning, with three hours of sleep I call to find out their status, they tell me to just come in at 7 because they still need to do another lab draw. I arrive and wait for the results. Squirts kidney numbers are still extremely elevated, and she also has an infection. The urinalysis shows a major hit to her kidneys. She will require 24 hour hospitalization that is only available in the Twin Cities. The other two need to continue IV fluids at my regular vet because the emergency vet clinic closes at 8AM. I tell her that I'm going to take them to Myhrom, in town. She pulls me aside and shows me an article online that states he's been killed in a motor vehicle crash. Honestly, the nicest man I know in Rochester - and such a wonderful vet. I can't even tell you. So the alternative is to take them to a friend's vet in a neighboring town. I drop them there and I'm off to Eden Prairie. Squirt will require 2-3 days of 24 hour hospitalization. Pacha and Kuzco are home now, but Pacha has to go back tomorrow for another day of IV fluids. They'll all be on a renal diet - yes prescription for at least a month, and Squirt may be longer depending on how extensive her damage is.

Basically by the end of this adventure we could've either taken a trip around the world, bought a solid used car just for the fun of it, or put in new flooring on an entire level of our house. Instead we'll have three healthy cats with possibly long-term special diets because of a contamination by a company that supplies meat for 40 feline brands and 50 canine brands, but has "failed to identify any issues with the products in question". Oh and according to them the "number of complaints has been relatively small", they're quoting 10 deaths, which according to the vets I've spoken to today (more than I care to mention), is a complete CROCK. They've had hundreds of deaths, thousands of sick animals, and thousands and thousands of calls. The numbers are sure to rise, because the cats didn't show ANY signs other than some vomit. If I hadn't seen the article I never would've taken them in. Apparently, when they do start acting sick, they're in irreparable kidney failure.

My hope is their is a huge law suit, and I'll be able to get some medical reimbursemnt. So far, the only offer the manufacturer is making is to reimburse you for the food. Gee thanks. Won't matter for us because we'll be eating prescription diet for a while.

My parting words are CHECK YOUR WET FOOD, the earlier you catch this the better. And if you have food that's has a recalled lot number, FREEZE IT in case of a future law suit.

Even if things get heavy, we'll all float on

Is it just me, or did the American Idols completely desecrate "Float On" in their Ford commercial? Ugh, I've got a bad taste in my mouth. I mean, I love Idol, but c'mon can we stick to the sugar pop and lay off the Modest Mouse?

How was your weekend?

An oft-asked question on a Monday morning. My first thought is, as long as I wasn't at work, it could not have been that bad. But I'm noticing that the definition of a "nice weekend" has changed a bit over the years. There used to be some task involved, like trying to clean the house. Do the taxes. Maybe even return something to a store that I've been meaning to do for months. Or even accomplish the aforementioned task AND do something "fun". Go out to eat, shop for something frivolous or go to a movie. For the record, I haven't been to a movie in a theater since. . .Cars - (summer 2006)? I suppose that's not as bad as some, but coming from someone, who saw Star Wars Episode I six times IN THE THEATER (yes, the nerd alert alarm is ringing - I'm ok with that) my movie going days have come to a screeching halt. In fact, what is now a "nice weekend" consists of sitting my butt on the couch and watching loads of TV, sprinkled with a little scrapbooking and assorted surfing on the internet box, and a pinch of semi-depression.

I have admittedly never been a real go-getter socially, but I'm having trouble trying to figure out what I'm doing with my time these days. I recently sent an email to my manager seeing if it would be possible to reduce my hours per pay period. I'm already at 32 hrs/wk, and I want to go down from that? When did I become such a slug? I have some rationale in my head that consists of "Well exceptional patient care is extremely tiring, I need the time to recover physically and mentally. Although there are people that do the same thing and work more hours than me, I wasn't built to manage that many hours of patient care". Sounds good, right? The alternative rationale is I just don't like to work. Now if you read this blog from its inception, you're probably curious as to why someone who can barely handle 32hrs/wk manages to go to New Orleans? The answer is: I have no idea. It is an enigma to me. I loved that trip, loved the work we did, loved the people I met. Maybe it's because it was temporary and I knew that going into it? These are the questions I intend to get to the bottom of. . .or not, maybe I'll just watch the rest of this movie.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

"Turn and face the strain". . .

Ok, although this blog was raised in Louisiana, it's time for a return back to Minnesota. And what better time than in the middle of a blizzard? I can honestly say I've never been in a blizzard before. I believe there was one in Ohio in '78, but I was only 3, so that doesn't count. Just missed the "Halloween Blizzard" of '91 when I came a week after to visit Macalester College. And I still applied early decision - what was I thinking? I've now been in the house for over 24 hours straight, and as much as I was looking forward to laying low this weekend, I am admitedly getting stir-crazy. I kind of envisioned popcorn, movies, hot chocolate. . .but it's been more like "Grumpfest 2007" with three main headliners: me, my husband and my mother. Three groups that probably shouldn't go on tour again. On the bright side, we've got plenty of food, we still have electricity and I've been in my PJs all day. That's not such a bad deal.

Getting back to the whole blog thing. I don't have a direction or theme, I'm just gonna take it as it comes and see what happens. Happy mushing!

Another Reason to Hate the Bears

You CAN'T be serious. . .

. . .and we're back!

Ok, I admittedly spent my first shift back at home "sick". I have no regrets because I was just plain exhausted and didn't feel I'd give the best patient care with my eyes half-cocked. My second shift was when I was back to work. . .but then again, not really. I walked the halls thinking about the people who will so desperately need follow-up care and won't get it any time soon. And the free clinic we left behind that doesn't have a chance of calling all the people they say they are to report abnormal labs. Leaving such a desperate situation and coming back to the WFMC was something I wasn't really able to digest in one shift. Or two shifts. It's so complicated. I feel guilty for having what I have. I feel anger towards people who complain about their care here. I feel horrible about all the people we left behind who had never asked for the situation they find themselves in - but yet want to stay and help their community. I don't even pick the trash up off my property lines, yet a resident down there mows all the lawns on his street just to keep the neighborhood looking somewhat residential, instead of abandoned.

I learned so much from the residents down there, just in the short time I had with each one I met. I learned an equal amount from the people I traveled down there with. These preconceived notions that plague me. . .when am I gonna learn? So many people surprised me with their integrity and leadership, I can't even believe it. I have 38 new friends, my inbox is full of reunion planning emails, and I have a whole new perspective on my daily life, married life and the world. I was warned by our head nurse during the planning meeting before we left that "this will change your life". I believed that the experience would be significant, but not quite life changing. . .yet here I am.

Stats from Recovery Week in New Orleans

provided by RAM's website at www.ramusa.org:

EXPEDITION TO NEW ORLEANS COMPLETE!

January 28, 2007 - February 3, 2007

East New Orleans

Official Statistics - FINAL

Total patients registered: 3839

Patient services rendered: 12,125

Total value of care: $1,075,954.50

Total volunteers: 871

Services per patient, average: 3.1

Glasses dispensed: 1,229

Dental extractions: 940

Fillings: 1,805

Medical services rendered: 9,660

Our Long Return

Well I walked into my house around midnight last night. After a very long day of travel, Northwest decided to cancel our Rochester connection from Minneapolis at 9:35pm and sent us down on a bus. The bus didn't leave until 10:30, so we didn't get to Rochester until 11:30pm, after leaving New Orleans at 5:00pm.

The last day of the clinic was yesterday and we all realized that they were going to struggle without our presence. Not that we were all so amazing they couldn't manage without us, but just the sheer number of volunteers that they were going to lose all at once. We left the clinic at 1100am for the airport. Operation Blessing sent us off with gift bags full of New Orleans classics, like coffee and beignets, pralines and t-shirts and a sweatshirt from Operation Blessing with their logo on it. They also made a video called Katrina Dreams, which we watched on our way to dinner on Thursday evening. The video brought us all to tears. It gave a such a compelling perspective of what went on and continues to go on down there.

Ok, to catch up a little, we did get to go to dinner and see a little bit of the French Quarter on Thursday. Mayo was able to arrange for some of our meal to be paid, but when Operation Blessing learned of this, they kicked in the extra to make it a free meal for all of the volunteers that went. We went to K-Paul's in the French Quarter, a restaurant opened by Chef Paul Prudhomme (http://www.kpauls.com/) - most locals described it as the best food in New Orleans, so we were all very excited to go. I had the gumbo as an appetizer, shrimp etouffee and sweet potato pecan pie for dessert. They reserved the entire upstairs for us, and the chef onsite (Paul Miller) came upstairs and explained the history of the restaurant and welcomed us here, explaining how badly New Orleans was in need of help. We had a wonderful dinner their, complete with a little live Cajun music, then went on for a quick walking tour of the French Quarter. The French Quarter had little damage due to the fact that it is a part of the city that is above sea level. They were able to get back up and running faster than anywhere else in New Orleans. Some of the people we talked to in New Orleans East (where the clinic was held) resented the fact that went the show New Orleans as being back up and running, they are showing clips of the French Quarter and the Superdome, when their is still less than half the population back because they have nowhere to live and come back to.

After some discussion all week with people who chose to stay and rebuild, I learned that for those who were able to get insurance money, the checks were written directly to the mortgage company. So if their house was paid off, they were most likely living with family or in a FEMA trailer in their front lawn or in a FEMA trailer park. They would work little by little to rebuild their houses, but it will be a long process. For those who did not receive any insurance money and their property is not livable, they continue to pay mortgage payments and are either living in a FEMA trailer or in another city. Some completely abandoned their property, and still don't know what happens with their mortgages/property. The city had required everyone to have their houses gutted down to the studs by now, to reduce the possibility of an infestation of rats and vermin in the city - which is what most neighborhoods look like now, a bunch of gutted houses with the occasional FEMA trailer. FEMA will conduct progress reports on their rebuild or persuit of new property, and if they're satisfied with progress they issue an extension on the trailer. FEMA will be repossessing the trailers at some point, but that isn't really discussed. What will happen then to these people then?

Operation Blessing has a few videos up on their website which give you a description on what the residents who came to the clinic had to do in order to get in a visual of what the site actually looks like, so check it out at http://www.ob.org/. You MAY even seen me! (hint, hint)

There were several points this week where I just felt like I was going to start bawling for all types of reasons. I had to take a break from doing Diabetic teaching the other day with a couple because I realized the odds of this man being able to manage his chronic illness was slim to none. Despite the effort he and his wife put in to managing his four blood pressure pills and check his glucose, the reality is this man had a incapacitating stroke a year ago, and we just given him his third glucometer. Why the third? Because the meters aren't the expense, the test strips are. So he's been given two other meters from free or sliding scale clinics, but can't afford to buy the test strips at $90 for a months worth. His Diabetes requires him to check his glucose twice a day and inject insulin twice a day, so that's 60 strips per month. I gave him extra, because I couldn't stand sending him away with one box, but who knows if he'll be able to continue his regimen. Every who was given a glucometer this week, will most likely have the same problem, unless there are more free/sliding-scale clinics that have test strips that will work with his new meter, and be affordable enough to continue to purchase.

I'm still processing the whole week right now. You spent 24 hours a day for 9 days with people you've never met before and amazingly band together in a way I've never experienced, like we were hand-picked to come together for this. To have that kind of connection, and to meet all of the people we met and shared stories with, it was sad to leave it all. Even though we were all coming from the same place and returning to the same place, we won't be able to duplicate the context of our connection, though I know we'll be forever bonded by it. I feel so fortunate to have had this opportunity, it's been life changing. I also feel fortunate to live somewhere were I have access to healthcare, schools, jobs and some security, although I now know that all of that can be taken away from me in a heartbeat. Truly, the biggest lesson for me was that it takes people to make a difference. Those neighborhoods being rebuilt are making progress because of everyday people who have pride in their city and their neighbors, not because there is a government sponsored program holding their hands, or direction from FEMA. They are all volunteers, they are all a community and they are trying to make a better life for themselves one brick at a time.

Weather in Rochester, MN: high of -4 degrees, with a -35 below windchill.

I Wanna be Sedated - Day Six

I'm only making that my post title because I'm listening to my mp3 player. Some of us got to go home early today for a break, so I'm just hanging at the warehouse typing on the blog.

First off, definitely feeling the beat down today. Limited resources, very needy people, tired body and mind, lots of sad stories. I actually had to take a sanity time-out. . .three people were already occupying the three actual eval rooms in critical care, and the doctors, then you've got people with lost paperwork wanting to see the same doctor they saw yesterday, city employees waiting to get their vital signs so they can go on to dental/vision, someone needs their glucose checked right now, and then - where I saw the meltdown in the distance, when the two WAY hypertensive (when I say WAY I mean 220/120) patients approach being escorted by two nurses from triage because they are Vietnamese and speak no english. Oh yeah, there is no Vietnamese interpreter and no space in critical care to help. I have to admit, I was on overload. There were three of us total to sort all 35-40 people out. I triaged what I could and had to walk away for about 15 minutes. Working with such limited resources can be so frustrating when you're used to being a the "World Famous Mayo Clinic" where you just yell and get everything you need. It forces you to be creative in ways you never thought and it can be very uncomfortable and very exciting also. Such a different environment.

We had several "critical" incidents today, but the one I've been waiting for I missed because I actually got a break to eat lunch and left the medical tent. A gentlemen was getting his glucose checked in the tent and it was 610, the nurse got up to tell the nearest physician and the gentlemen started seizing and fell off his chair, going pulseless. I'm so proud of this nurse because she managed the room and got a code going. And where was her critical care nursing help? Eating lunch. Ugh.

Last night I was talking with some other volunteers about overwhelmed I've been with how well we're all working together. I realize it's only a week that we'll be here, but to not know anyone your going with, then be thrown into a chaotic situation with little to no direction and handle the way we have. . .I'm just extremely proud of everyone. People are just shining with their strengths. Just when I think I have someone figured out, they blow me away with something totally amazing and selfless. I mean, there aren't enough words to describe the group dynamic here. It's invaluable to this mission. It's not just nurses, it's the lab people that are working continuously without complaints, it's the pharmacists who have to educate people with very little knowledge of their own chronic illness process on their new medications; the doctors who have patients backed up one after the other - they so much as peak out of their little stall in the tent and we're throwing another patient at them. We have a security guy and a tech guy who have gone above and beyond their scope, doing our laundry, fixing our machines, getting supplies overnighted from Mayo, driving us to Walmart every night, generally putting up with our shit 24/7. I'm speechless.

Tomorrow night one of the "head guys" - I say that because I have no idea what his title is. . .has planned a dinner outing for the entire group, one of the best restaurants in New Orleans - according to one of the locals. I'm excited. I haven't been able to see Aaron down here yet, he got stuck at the clinic he works at, so he won't be able to come over with Cheri until Friday evening. I'm pumped to talk to them about the healthcare down here - to get another perspective.

The high tomorrow is 48 degrees with an 80% chance of rain.

Vote Al Frankin. . .

Stories

I needed a place to put story anecdotes to be developed later. . .so here are the teasers. . .

Woman raped by a male nurse.
There was a woman I took a medical history on in triage where I nearly lost it in front of her. An unassuming lady in her 50s coming in with only a few complaints but just hadn't seen a doctor in over a year. After running down my list of triage questions I came to HIV and she paused and said, "You know I should probably get screened. I was raped by a male nurse after Katrina and I never did get tested." I was in such shock, I had no words. A nurse - a patient advocate - during one of the worst storms in 20 years, rapes a patient. It was just too much.

CD of pics from EMS, plenty of gruesome pictures of police shooting back at looters, corpses, and plucking people from their roofs.

The man who had a stroke a year ago because his diabetes was completely uncontrolled because he has no insulin because his clinic closed because of Katrina - just needs test strips because he can't afford them at his local pharmacy. We were giving away meters and test strips, but we were currently out, and so I'm going watch this man walk away from me, into the New Orleans abyss knowing that he has no way to check his glucose and treat his diabetes properly.

Thoughts:
Why people stay. Why people go. FEMA trailers. Corruption in the school board and Louisiana state government. The endless complements on our presence and the wonderful hugs I get all day, every day. Confusion and politics in the good samaritan game.

Quotes:
"I'm tired, I'm cold, I'm wet, and my ass is dragging."
"Kicking tires and lighting fires."
"Patient check-in, STOP sending patients to the medical tent."
"Anybody want a sandwich?"

C-C-Cold - Day Five

I didn't post yesterday because I had no energy to lift my fingers to type. Talking with some other Mayo peeps today, we all agree that this is the best type of exhaustion we've ever had. We have fun all day with everyone at the clinic, but seeing 400 patients in a day is overwhelming.

Yesterday a RN from New Orleans gave us a tour of New Orleans East, the lower and upper 9th ward and the French Quarter. There are parts of the 9th ward that are simply frozen in time. It's just astonishing. One house that we saw had a dresser on the roof with clothes hanging out of the drawers. There are still piles of waste that are all over the neighborhoods waiting for a FEMA pick-up. Then you got out to the French Quarter, and it was business as usual. The two places are within a couple miles of each other and there couldn't be more of a contrast. I learned from our guide that in the state of Louisiana, they are on the "charity bed" system, which means hospitals are allowed to refuse care, but are also required to offer a certain number of "charity beds". So if the charity beds are full, they can refuse care. Now for the kicker, right now with only three hospitals being open in New Orleans proper, there are 13 charity beds available. We have it so good in MN. This state is going to have to take an honest look at their healthcare system and their school system. It's just sad.

Tomorrow's forecast, 10% chance of rain, high of 48 degrees.

Sunny Sunday - Day Three

What a wonderful day! We had a total of 1007 patient interactions today, which meant over 400 medical visits. I ended up working in the medical tent where all of the doctors were seeing patients. There were three of us that ended up having to organize the flow of patients for the day, basically making it up as we went along. It was extremely challenging as none of us had any experience doing anything of the like, but we made it work. I can honestly say at the end of the day we truly felt like we had made an impact. We had face-to-face time with every single patient that came through that medical tent, every single one completely grateful for our time and service. We were just happy to be down here, helping out however we could. I am EXHAUSTED. We're back at it tomorrow morning at 0500, with bells on.

Tomorrow's forecast, partly sunny high of 50.

I would love to elaborate on the details of the day, but I'm truly so tired, I may fall out of my chair. I'm going to try and jot down tidbits in my journal so I don't forget it all.

Have a great week!